Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Woke Up This Morning and I Got Myself An Offense

Behold, the new face of the NBA

Before Dawn of Time
James Nasmith's head broke open
Out came Barone

Sit down, Fratello
Let Barone work his magic
Run, Chucky Atkins

Hey You! Mike Miller.
Score points like Alex English
or you shave my back

The Prophecy of Barbaro and Rainbow Bridge

Luke 25:1
And Yea, Barbaro Rose Up.
Cherub Pony Rides.

Solomon was wise
Samson was strong, Job patient.
Barbaro ran fast.

The healing process continued

A warrior's name
Echos through eternity
Goodnight my sweet prince.

As the sky goes dark
We pray the four winds blow you
Safely home. My friend.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Barbaro Destroyed in Firefight by Youth in Asia

Please leave your thoughts for Barbaro

Taken too early
Actually, I don't know
What is horse lifespan?

Pegasus' first son,
Midwest Widows pine for thee
Cats on a sweatshirt

Jesus' Mighty Steed
Died to save our horse-like sins
Fire and Brimstone Reign

Big Sassy Boss Horse
My sixteen cats and I mourn
Black stirrup pants. Grief.

Barbaro. I weep.
Hey, a duck came back to life!
What's a Barbaro?

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Carson Palmer Doesn't Care About Black People

Carson Palmer is a dirty snitch

Remember this, 9?
KVO sent the message
Next: Shank in kidney

Finky McJudas
Go cornhole something. Let my
Tween date drink Mad Dog

Statutory ain't
No thing. Watch yo back, Carson.
Snitches get stitches

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Oscar Preview: More awful hateful posts

Bravo! Ms Mirren
Your eloquent perfomance
Warms both heart and soul.

Blast from the Past...On Your Daughter's Face

Oh what a cute dog.
Careful, pops. Where's your daughters?
Depraved Spuds tagteam.

Doug Flutie's Outreach Program

Sign: "Will coach for food"
Fugazi U needs headlines
Homeless coach for hire

Crackhead coach. Smart Move.
Does what other coaches wont.
Will suck dick for wins

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

To Be Bruce Pearl, You've Got to Beat Bruce Pearl

Watch shirtless Bruce Pearl.
Summitt's poison snatch admits,
every panty's moist.

Bruce Pearl is potent.
Nine months from now, baby boom.
Coeds dropped their drawers

Put your hands where I can see them and slowly step away from the coach.

Can't Touch This

No chance, Jerry Jones
Hands off mustachioed coach.
Pacman's ire awaits

Monday, January 22, 2007

Nothin' But a Gangsta Party

Calming cup of tea
Sensible slacks from The Gap
Uncle Tom Bowl I

They must have moved Freaknik to Miami this year

Lovie and Tony
Freaknik on 50 yard line
Watch your wallets son!

Friday, January 19, 2007

A Young Child's Dying Wish (Overheard)

Please send second stroke
Like a Dudley Death Drop, Lord
Bruschi down for count.

AFC Championship Preview: Die Slow Motherfuckers

Manning. Belichek.
Bruschi. Seriously, blow me.
This game fucking sucks.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Man Law. Jimmy Johnson, Bruce, and Jesus are BFF.

Unbreakable bond.
JJ shirtlessly imbibed.
Laugh. Dance. In the Sun.

How 'bout them Cowboys Special Teams Circa 1996??!?

You call that intense?
The Sultan of Special Teams
Avezzano? Bonnnnng.

He makes Lombardi
Look like a no-talent queer
Avezanno. Bonnnng.

Insightful NFC Championship Preview

This aint a squash game
Turtlenecks and gross white wife
Cant help Uncle Tom

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

You can take the Dirtbag out of Cincy, but you can't take the Cincy out of the Dirtbag

I'm Bobby Huggins
Sure, I'll coach in Manhattan!!!
...Where the fuck am I?